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Perfect gift for anyone that is clearly not a people person.
Tags: anti social, ew, funny, funny people, humor
Atheism pun. It's a non-prophet organization!
Tags: anti religion, atheist, belief, believe, bible
Things I like... and I cannot lie.
Tags: baby got back, butts, clue, funny, game show
Get me a slice... I'll be fine.
Tags: food, funny pizza, humor, i love pizza, pizza
If you want to send me unsolicited sms pics... send dog pics, NOT dick pics.
Tags: animal, dick, dog, dogs, funny
Perfect for anyone that will do ANYTHING for a slice of pizza!
Tags: cheese, crust, food, funny pizza, i love pizza
A wise philosopher once said - 'Meh-rry Christmas.'
Tags: aristotle, christmas, greece, greek, humor
I'm in charge here!
Tags: boss, coordinator, funny, funny saying, funny slogan
I have a hangover... does anybody know what that means? I was drunk yesterday.
Tags: alchohol, alcohol, beer, booze, cocktail
All aboard the bipolar express!
Tags: antisocial, anxiety, bipolar awareness, christmas, depression
That's called The Shocker!
Tags: butt, crude, funny, hand, humor
I'm surrounded by idiots!
Tags: anti social, antisocial, funny, humor, humour
I'll have a sarcastic retort for you any second now.
Tags: buffering, comment, funny, humor, humour
These are the essentials of a Thanksgiving day feast!
Tags: cranberries, cranberry sauce, funny thanksgiving, gravy, happy thanksgiving
I'm feeling down... send noods, ASAP!
Tags: chopsticks, humor, japan, japanese, kawaii
These are the four very important food groups for Xmas Elves!
Tags: buddy, candy, candy canes, candy corns, christmas
Is that too much information?
Tags: bathroom, diarrhea, humor, ibs, irritable bowel syndrome
We wish you a really Merry fucking Christmas!
Tags: christmas, christmas humor, christmas sweater, cussing, funny xmas
It sucks to be me... sarcastic anxiety humor.
Tags: antisocial, anxiety, anxious, humor, introvert
I'm not gay... but my penis is!
Tags: bisexual, funny, gay humor, gay pride, humor
What's your drink of choice? A negroni sbagliato... with prosecco in it. Stunning.
Tags: alcohol, bartender, cocktail, drink, drinking
These are all my qualities.
Tags: abbr, acronym, adult, beautiful, bitch face
All places should be safe spaces.
Tags: bisexual, gay, gay pride, lesbian, lgbt
It's festive... and French?
Tags: christmas, french, holiday sweater, humor, let it snow christmas
Math insPIres me!
Tags: algebra, funny math, math, mathematic, mathematician
Never let the future disturb you. You will meet it, if you have to, with the same weapons of reason which today arm you against the present.
Tags: future, humor, inspiration, inspirational, motivation
I will beat... sorry, eat your ass.
Tags: bisexual, butt, butt stuff, eat ass, gay
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