StevieVanB

My partner had a dream of a marketing campaign underscoring that BEEZ-IT brand crackers were in fact BEE FLAVORED and NOT HONEY FLAVORED. We felt that it was time the truth got out, and so we have made this shirt.

Did you like Parks and Rec? Did you see Li'l Sebastian? Here he is! See if he'll sign it! --Honestly, I only made this for the sticker option--take a look for that!

SCREAMY is a fry cook condemned to haunt they kitchen forever. BEWARE his shrieking customer service, his pallid onion rings.

Do you like Koalas? How about legumes? If you said YESSIR, have I got the shirt for you! I recommend getting a bright color shirt so the peanut butter part appears.

Are you as exhausted by *everything* as I am?????? PROVE IT by wearing this shirt.

Are you in love with the Gyros Girl? I sure am! Until the rotating meat company starts selling Gyros Girl merch properly and truly acknowledging their contribution to the culture of the American meal, please avail yourself of this meager facsimile of the Gyros Girls' unending and ubiquitous allure....

I drew this for a child who was my pen pal a few years ago, but since it's kinda cute and I still like crab, here it is available for purchase as a print or bag or whatever. If you learned anything from this shirt, you have to buy it! I DON'T MAKE THE RULES ALSO PROTECT OUR OCEANS

This is the design you've been waiting for! Guaranteed to be your favorite Thanksgiving-themed shirt for many joyous years. If they don't make your size please enjoy a mug. Slither forth and be thankful this Thanksgiving. Based on me mis-hearing my niece and nephew's felicitations on the phone one year.

Nutcracker face makes it clear you're not quite merry or bright this holiday season.

I DREAMED THIS SHIRT. Two nights ago I dreamt that I was Ben Carson if he were a sentient streetcar, and later, I dreamt a vision of this shirt. AND NOW MY DREAM IS TRUE. This will be on sale for 72 hours? And then regular price after that. GREAT CHRISTMAS GIFT for those who love dream-bees. I RECOMMEND BUYING THE HOODIE, as that is how I dreamt it. DON'T DREAM IT. "BEE" IT.

My fourth most horrifying childhood nightmare was of visiting a neon-and-crosshatched demon motel. I tried to stand on the baseboards of the lobby, the way you might climb on the edge of a built-in tub, but kept slipping off. Before long, this little blue bastard bit my arm, and as I woke up, I felt a very vivid pain. Have you ever felt pain in a dream? Is that a thing? This is an illustration of the look and sense of portent in the dream. Recommend getting the orange one so the blue guy stands out, but you do you.

Now more than ever! Originally drawn on election night 2016, this cathartic design gives visual form to our collective hypervigilant trauma and rage. By buying this shirt you are enriching me with dollars I will spend on sweet, numbing alcohol and donations to Democrat and Democratic Socialist candidates around the area and, occasionally, country. WHAT ARE YOU MAD ABOUT?