Sardonic Merch

What is real and are you feeling it?

Try, Try, & Fail Again

Simple white letters on black background: "SUCH A MESS". Some of us are just a mess and y'know what? embrace it. There are too many slick people out there trying to be "influencers". Be real, be messy, be you.

Simple white letters on black background: "such a mess". Some of us are just a mess and y'know what? embrace it. There are too many slick people out there trying to be "influencers". Be real, be messy, be you.

Simple white letters on black background: "My life is not going as planned". I don't know what I had in mind but it wasn't THIS. Make it make sense.

"I am very poorly today and very stupid and hate everybody and everything." Charles Darwin wrote it in 1861 (that's his genuine signature) but it's just as true now. It's too peoplely out there and everything sucks. Variants in color and typeface available.

An Exponent Of Edgy Wildly Dark Exaggerated Controversial Statements.

An Exponent Of Edgy Wildly Dark Exaggerated Controversial Statements.

Do you live on Planet Snark? Is "sardonic" your second language and "cynical" your third? Do you do deadpan more than you do straight talk? Maybe this design is for you.

Simple white letters on black background: "Rather overwhelmed, actually." If you're exhausted you're completely normal. It's been a helluva time. You're doing fine. Keep going.

Simple white letters on black background: "got the morbs". Are you a Victorian drama queen or just got your eyes open to the dark and depressing state of the world? Ugh, it's all too much.

Celebrate your sense of humour with this witty design. Perfect for those who enjoy a chuckle and a hint of sarcasm, it humorously reflects the intricacies of social interactions and a busy lifestyle. This amusing and engaging quote is a great pick for anyone who enjoys a playful spin on the demands of the modern world. It's a fantastic gift idea for anyone who loves a laugh and appreciates the charm of clever wit and banter.

Simple white letters on black background: "Actually yes, I WAS born in a barn." Raised by wolves. In a barn. Yep. It explains a lot.

Simple white letters on black background: "INDEPENDENT - Like, sometimes I slice my own cake." You may not know how to change a tire or boil an egg but you can get your own cake and pour your own coffee. Score!

The percontation point (punctus percontativus), or rhetorical question mark, also known as an ironicon was invented by Henry Denham in the 1580s and was used at the end of a rhetorical question; however, its use died out in the 17th century. It was the reverse of an ordinary question mark, so that instead of the main opening pointing back into the sentence, it opened away from it.

A minimal typography design, of the word ironic in white colored text. Wear it with irony. Looks best on classic black and other strong colors.

Simple white letters on black background: "bad example". Wear it as a warning to others - or maybe a badge of honor. Of course, your absurd sense of humor and idea of the ridiculous could also be a reason.

A minimal typography design, of the word sarcastic in white colored text. Wear it with sarcasm. Looks best on classic black and other strong colors.

Simple white letters on black background: "petty". Do you hold a grudge - for years if necessary - and never forget a slight? You just might be petty. You might even be proud of it.

Get ready to raise some smiles with our amusing "More enthusiastic than competent" t-shirt. This funny text design captures the essence of engaging enthusiasm even when skills might not match up. Wear this shirt proudly and spread the joy and humor with others as you embrace the lighthearted side of life.

Simple white letters on black background: "- and by 'us' I mean 'me'". For those who know they're the most important person in any room, and are unashamed of the fact. Sarcastic - or sincere? We all know.

The percontation point (punctus percontativus), or rhetorical question mark, also known as an ironicon was invented by Henry Denham in the 1580s and was used at the end of a rhetorical question; however, its use died out in the 17th century. It was the reverse of an ordinary question mark, so that instead of the main opening pointing back into the sentence, it opened away from it.

Simple white letters on black background: "New year, new me - but even worse." Gym? Eating better? Stop swearing? Don't make me laugh. The 2020s are a race to the bottom and we're all competing.

but seriously though

This inspirational tee shirt design comes in Men, Women, and Kid or youth sizes as well as several color options. These shirts make a great gift for friends, family, Mom, Dad, Brother, Sister, Aunt, Uncle, and even cousins. If you are serious about track, running, jogging, and sprinting, then you will love these tshirts.

What is the worst that could happen from advertising this?

Sarcastic emoji with tongue out, be careful!

SO READY FOR THE AIRING OF GRIEVANCES + Festivus pole. We need little anti-advent calendars to help us count down to Festivus. Maybe with a tiny liquor bottle behind each door. And then feats of strength. Also available in white.

Simple white letters on black background: "NEW YEAR, NEW ME - BUT EVEN WORSE". Gym? Eating better? Stop swearing? Don't make me laugh. The 2020s are a race to the bottom and we're all competing.

I spend 500% of my time exagerating.

Ew Work

Funny Quarantine Quotes to brighten your day.

Are you the smartest person you know? Do you have a sarcastic streak a mile wide that you just love to show your friends and family? Make sure everyone knows that they are not as bright as you think you are with this Of Course I Talk To Myself! Sometimes I need expert advice. Funny, Sarcastic Tee Shirt

Simple white letters on black background: "doomscroller". If you weren't a doomscroller before 2020, you sure as dangit are now. Pick your poison - Twitter, the book of faces, various news sites - and try to find today's things that threaten us with death. Fun!