Crocco's Riverfront Apparel

When you really understand how it works, you don't really have any choice but to put on the wig and the nose and laugh. You really dont have any choice.

Listen, fren, I know the world is scary right now, but...it's gonna get way worse. Still, that's no excuse to not wear clothes. Why not face the coming darkness while wearing this stylish shirt, to fully display your contempt for what should be horribly blackpilling?

Heed the wisdom of the noted philosopher, Apuctetus, and ignore the shrieks of your detractors.

He's on to you.

The caption says it all. Special thanks again to the best little robot frog in the whole damn Pond, for his permission to work with his and his wife's concepts. It was a pleasure as always.

...at your own convenience. Special thanks to the Pond's best little android frog for inspiring and allowing his lovely Eve to be part of Croctober's Artings!

They wanted personal rights and freedoms, the fascists. Thank God we had Safety and a Powerful Govt to help sort that out. We can all be free of the weight of personal freedom now, and thankful for it, indeed!

Fabuloso. A cleaning chemical of highest excellence. Most people, upon drinking it, become violently ill. Not so for this one. No, when she drinks Fabuloso... ...SHE ASCENDS.

We hunt wolves as wolves.

Throwback to some classic cartoons, for all the old frens out there.

Its settled, capisce? What, why? Because Tony f*ckin' Fauci f*ckin' said so, that's f*ckin' why!

“Attacks on me, quite frankly, are attacks on science,” Fauci said Wednesday.

Burger. Burgur. Borgar. Borgur. KING.

Slave. Barbarian. Warrior. Frog. Frog. Warrior. Gladiator. King.

OUR FRENS DANCE.

There do be all manner of critters livin' out there in them swamps.

Salut à tous Sa Majesté Royale, Albâtre d'Arc, la Reine de la Rivière Gelée!

After a terrifying incident involving the ravenous smollocroccos, the Weather Groyp was left without a hand. It would have been the end for his meteorological career, but the combined science of the Pond and the River prevailed. We had the technology. We could rebuild him. The weather is cozier than ever now. Or else.

A wizard is never late. Nor is he early. He arrives precisely when he means to, and usually in snazzy shades.

If you know, you know.

Unbothered. Moisturized. Happy. In his lane. Focused. Flourishing.

"Welcome, traveler! Can I bother you to stay for dinner? The meat will be to die for, I promise."

The Pond has many guardians.

You get what you f*cking deserve, Kings.

He howls! He honks! HE KILLS! Beware the Honkler Moon, for when it rises, NPCs flee in utter terror from...the WEREHONK! Now in wholesome COZICOLOR!

Through ancient and darkling River magicks, the Crocco unlocked a terrible thing within the once-demure Frakes. The Eldritch Destroyer, She-Who-Is-Frakes, Groypmother, is unleashed. The Crocco weeps for what he has wrought.

The Salty Bones Marauder has sailed the Pond for countless years, and now you can bring his infamy with wherever you may sail! Or walk. Or drive. Cavalry charge, even. Its a multipurpose design, really.

Just a pretty woman in a pretty dress, WITH SOME SERIOUSLY KING-LEVEL SHADES. You know what's up. Thanks for letting me put you on a shirt, Belle!

The title says it all. From the crown, to the sub of choice, to the suit, to that clearly happy look, this fren is a true King. King. Capital K. Thanks for letting me put you on a shirt, Jordan!

Forget White Boy Summer. This summer, its all about the Pond and frens!

He was barred from speaking...so he allowed his blade to speak for him. AND IT SPOKE IN BLOOD!

THE WEAK FEAR THE STRONG, BELLE. THINK.

Just when you thought it was safe to go out, in a whirl of honking giggles and flashing color, your guts are all over the floor and worse, you've lost your precious baguette.

A little late in the season, but lets be honest - its never too late for a weather report.

Beware the Marvomancer! Her powers are legendary, raising the dead, the limp, and the hornt...then bonking them for their sins!

There are swords, there's sorcery, there's high fantasy... ...and then there are the Marvettes.